How much conflict is normal in a relationship? The Relationship Conflict
Did you get mad when you agreed to go out and watch a movie and he didn’t show up on time? Or did you feel irritated when she switched off her cellphone when you were trying to reach her? Have you ever disagreed with your partner? When was the last time both of you experienced some kind of conflict? I’m sure this will answer your question on how much conflict is normal in a relationship.
Even the happy and lovable relationships experience conflict. When a boyfriends or girlfriends who care about to one another, usually find it necessary to make hard decisions, most couples might find their decisions have differences based on their opinion and perspective. Usually these kinds of conflict occur depends on the scope of a certain problem, how the couple can find a solutions to it, or what can be the possible outcome of the problem they are experiencing.
One very essential thing to you should always to remember in any type of relationship is that even people who always care about to one another, usually don’t always behave or think what they expected. But because they love and care to and another, they will surely find a way to accept it and resolve the conflict that they undergoing in a relationship. Therefore, Conflict issues can be a means to an end if the couples can learn how to respect for each another’s perspectives and contributions and also make constructive decision-making.
But before a couple starts solving the problem, it’s important for them to be fully aware of the true nature of the problem first, if indeed there is a problem to begin with. So if we are working at the premise that a relationship – your relationship – begins with love, then it usually follows that the ind of love could stem out from the loss of it.
How Much Conflict is Normal in a Relationship – Watch out for these minefields!
The road to togetherness is always littered with little minefields waiting to be ignited. Below are some of the little dynamite factors in relationships that could blow up into gargantuan conflicts when ignored. Avoid them!
How Much Conflict is Normal in a Relationship – Complacency
Remember the saying “Familiarity breeds contempt”? When you both become too comfortable and familiar, then a break up is possible. When each of you try to invade each other’s personal space, then the relationship becomes boring. If continued appreciation is not there, then unhappiness sets in. Sometimes the relationship can become so predictable that you already know how your partner will respond to any situation. Also diverting your attention from your partner will cause him or her to feel neglected and unloved.
How Much Conflict is Normal in a Relationship – Making demands
After being in a relationship for a while, you may have the tendency to take certain behaviors for granted. The things that you once wanted to do make your partner happy is now expected of you. These requests become emotionally backed demands.
Along with them comes blaming and an unhealthy focusing on the past. For instance, your partner says, “you used to hug me a lot, but you don’t do it anymore, that means you don’t love me anymore, you’re no longer the person I fell in love with.”
You also tend to expect your partner to read your mind, you want the other person to know how you feel even if you don’t tell him or her the truth about your emotional state. You think they would instinctively know what you want even if you don’t ask for it. At this point you are likely to see all the faults of your partner and may even be eager to point them out.
How Much Conflict is Normal is a Relationship – Growing Dissatisfaction
You feel dissatisfied because you start regarding your relationship as a source of unhappy experiences. When unhappiness builds up, managing relationship becomes painful and frustrating. Hurtful criticisms, infidelity, lack of physical contact, etc. are taking their toll. You find it extremely difficult to tolerate your partner’s quirks and imperfections, even the most trivial ones.
How Much Conflict is Normal is a Relationship – Breakdown
This is when there’s a real absence of tolerance for each other. It occurs when your relationship becomes too complacent and the demands are too intense. Dissatisfaction is then great enough and this becomes the breaking point. It’s shades of “I can’t take it anymore,” “It’s over,” and “Enough is enough.”
At this point one or both of you start thinking is this relationship really worth it? You no longer think that your partner can satisfy your wants and needs. And your feeling is, this person is unable to love me the way I want to be loved.